You Changed A Life

To: Gordana Dizdarevic
Submitted By: Orhan Dizdarevic

The backbone of our family is my mother, Gordana Dizdarevic. Under trying circumstances, that would discourage most from continuing, she shows relentless drive towards making her family happy. As a baby I found comfort in her arms, the sound of her voice, and in the words she spoke. As a young boy I found strength as she picked up the fallen pieces after a dramatic move to a new world and new home. As a teenager I encountered a demanding, no nonsense matriarchal presence, sometimes no fun. Today I am glad that presence was there, for I have the best possible example from which to lead my own family in the future. Volim te najdraza Majko.

Orhan Dizdarevic
Costa Mesa, CA

I keep going back to this beautiful letter of love and caring I received from a friend. It has changed my life in so many ways, and I hope, now yours:
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Hi Pattie! Thanks for taking my feedback positively. I didn't want to say this on your Wall...I invite you to check how you spelled his URL. Sending you lots of smiles :) Is it possible that you have a tendency to do things in a hurry without being present?

When I was in first grade and got my first textbooks, my father wrote my name on the back of each book, quietly, slowly, fully present, as if he was pouring his entire being into each character of my name. He didn't say a word until he finished all the books. It felt so deeply peaceful and loving to be there witnessing it, and it is one of the most vivid memories of my childhood and of my father. I think he also taught me by the way he handled the books how important it is to value learning. All of it was communicated to me in his silent attentiveness.

I later learned calligraphy, and experienced the joy and richness of meditation in action or action in a state of no-mind.

Later, when I started teaching piano, I noticed that people are so much in a hurry, going from place to place, never fully present with their action, always scattered and not being able to enjoy stillness and silence. Always doing doing doing. My piano students' parents would hand me a check after quickly scribbling my name and amount. The handwriting was careless as if it weren't important, and many parents after taking months of lessons with me would still ask me to spell my name. At these times, I would often think of my father and the richness of complete attention that he taught me. This complete presence in all actions comes from Zen, and it pervaded my life growing up. Whether it's serving a meal, flower arranging, martial arts, or simply cleaning the house, it is something my siblings and I were taught to value. Richness is not in the future, but in our harmonious relationship to what is here now.

It is not how much we do that is important, but how much we do with presence and with love.

Thank you for this opportunity to share...!! I hope this has a more positive effect than a negative effect...

Signed,
R

To: Margarita Rivera
Posted By: Rosa Furumoto
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Hi Pattie,
Thank you for the beautiful Butterfly Nautilus Touchstone of Gratitude. The idea of gratitude is so wonderful and important. I will be sending it on to my sister, Margarita Rivera (Margy). Here is why I am grateful to her. I wish you the best with your website.
Warmly,
Rosa Furumoto
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Rosa:
Thank you so much for your touching story. I must share with you my reaction - - - pure, unadulterated laughter and giggles! "The Enema Queen?" All of the postings to date are receiving a header. After reading your letter, I can think of no better header than "The Enema Queen." Please let me know if this works for you. I can TRY to think of something better, but this one is pretty catchy!
~~hugs!
Pattie
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HI Pattie,
I think this is a great title and I agree it is pretty funny! :) I must thank you again for your wonderful project. I cried such wonderful tears when I wrote the piece for my sister. She just received it and was so moved by it she also cried. I must tell you how profound it is what you are doing. Please know that you are changing the world with your work.
Sincerely,
Rosa
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HOW MY SISTER, MARGARITA RIVERA, CHANGED 2 LIVES

I want to express gratitude to my sister, Margarita Rivera, (Margy) for changing my life and my mom's life. Before, I was never really close to my sister and didn't really know her. When my mom was very sick and dying of cancer my mom came to live with me. Margy would come after work almost daily to spend time with my mom. She would help with whatever needed doing-dressing wounds, cleaning up messes, etc. When my mom was constipated Margy would help with this as well, so my name for my sister was "The Enema Queen." Sometimes my mom would go just because I told her I was going to call the "Enema Queen." Margy was present for my mom in a loving way. She would bring movies and sit with my mom watching the movies and eating popcorn. Margy accidentally broke her foot and the doctor ordered her to rest and stay off her foot. She didn't listen and would hobble on crutches to help my mom anyway. Margy is very strong and committed.

Margy doesn't know how much strength her visits gave to me and mom. My mom suffered a lot and wondered out loud why she did. I explained to my mom that maybe her suffering was a way for her children to learn to love and appreciate each other. I truly believe this was the gift of my mom's suffering and eventual death because, gradually, I got to see what a blessing it is to have a loving compassionate sister like Margy. She has a heart of gold. Even if people have done wrong things to her in the past, she still loves them and tries her best to be kind. I am not sure if Margy realizes how precious, divine, compassionate, and beautiful she is- so I am letting her know by sending her the Nautilus Butterfly. I love and appreciate my sister, Margy.
Sincerely,

Rosa Furumoto
Sylmar, CA

To: George Selkinas
Submitted by: Tim Tierra

When I was 23 years old, and just out of college, I moved into an apartment in New York with three other roommates. Four guys sharing a two bedroom, one bath, walk-up. Not much space, not too clean, very noisy, but a lot of fun. Our next door neighbor, George, lived alone and always had an extra moment or two to share, an ear for listening, and a refrigerator full of frozen dinners. Honestly, I do not know how many meals I would have gone without that first year in New York, had it not been for George Selkinas. I live in Los Angeles now. Every few years, it seems, a new group of guys, roommates, straight out of college, moves into the apartment down the hall. Every year I adopt one of those kids and, in true George Selkinas style, we sit at the table/desk and talk about life and heat up a couple of frozen dinners.
Regards,
Timothy Tierra
Los Angeles

To: Tess Alexander
Submitted By: Anita Wiggins

This last week I went to girl’s camp with my church. Girls ages 12-17 are invited to attend camp every year. Some of the girls who come to camp are coming for the first time, and others have had the experience as many as five or six times before. This year was a wonderful year, and the spirit there was one of love, acceptance, and peace, which made space for the girls to have a lot of fun. As I reflect back on the week and ask myself why there was such a good spirit there, my thoughts focus on one girl in particular – Tess Alexander. I don’t even know if Tess or the other people who attended camp are aware of what she did, but I watched her and saw her beautiful talent at work right before my eyes.

Tess is fun, funny, outgoing and popular, and everyone wants to be her friend. I watched Tess in action as she gave attention and lovingly gave a nickname to a first year girl who seemed a little awkward, who was quiet and kept to herself. This girl loved the attention and could feel the good spirit and love that was coming from Tess' heart. The girl began to open up and become a part of the group. As she did this, the other girls started noticing her, including her and loving her.

During the course of the week, the 100 girls and leaders at camp became a cohesive group of friends, all feeling loved, part of the group, and safe to open up. I believe that Tess' kindness and ability to see the beauty in this girl sparked something in everyone at camp (including the girl) that opened all of us to see a beauty that, if left to ourselves, we may have glossed over. Tess changed not only this girl’s life, but the life of every single person who attended camp this year. She also changed my life by showing me how valuable a gift the talent of being openhearted is. I will be slow to overlook or dismiss this talent in myself or in others again because of what I saw in Tess.

Anita Wiggins
Santa Clarita, CA

To: Sister Jacinta
Submitted By: Sue Wilkinson

Hi Pattie, What a great idea. The touchstone is so beautiful--of course I wanted to keep it for myself. I am really thankful to be able to recognize Sister. Many Blessings. Sue Wilkinson

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Sr. Jacinta is a sister of the Holy Family and resides in Fremont, California. It has been an honor to get to know her and hear her stories. She emanates pure love and light from her very being. Sister worked for many years with people that had HIV/AIDS, beginning in the eighties when not much was know about this tragic disease. When asked what she did, She replies, "I just loved them." She sat by their bedside and loved them as they lay dying. She has made a difference in my life, also. I call her my "anam cara," soul friend. Thank you so much for the opportunity to tell a little about this beautiful woman.

Sue Wilkinson
Columbia Falls, MT

To: Rory Cohen
Posted By: Ron Cohen

The person I have chosen to share the "Touchstone" with is Rory Cohen. She is my sister, my guru and my best friend. There is no one on the planet that is more loving, giving, kind, generous, understanding and wise than Rory. She has spent her life giving to her family, friends and to people from around the world that he has never even met. It's a rare occasion to find a couch or spare bedroom in her home that is not occupied by a friend in need, an exchange student or one of her children's friends.

Her unconditional loving is only matched by her commitment to her own personal growth and that of her fortunate coaching clients.

I am blessed beyond measure to have Rory in my life and it is with such deep love and gratitude that I present her with the "Touchstone".

Lon Cohen
Marina del Rey, CA

"and in the end.. the love you take is equal to the love you make"
- The Beatles

To: My Wife, Kim Krieger
Posted By: Gary Krieger

Kim has had a special place in my heart since we've been kids. We met when we were 18 years old and have been together ever since. We just celebrated our 42nd anniversary. She has changed my life in so many ways it's hard to put it into a short paragraph. First and foremost, she's been my best friend for most of my life, sharing joy, happiness, struggles, pain and sorrows. She's lifted me up when I've been down and laughed with me throughout our lives. She delivered our children and made me a father. Because of her, I heard the word "Daddy" for the first time. And the second time. And the third time, we chose parenthood by adopting our daughter. "Daddy" was just as sweet! Kim was the mother of mothers for our children and was recently told by a childhood friend of our son's that "she was the mother every one of their friends wished they'd had". She brought joy and laughter into our home and always had delicious home cooked meals for everyone. My wife has comforted us, healed us and modeled integrity for us. She's stood by our side through the best of times and the worst of times, and always made me feel strong and masculine and special. She is loved by her grandchildren and each of them find her special, loving and fun. They are her joy.

Kim has also given to so many others. As a Marriage and Family Therapist, she helped countless clients over 20 plus years. She's volunteered for the MS Society and Our House, a non-profit grief counseling agency. She's always there for friends, family and anyone who needs a friend, confidante or mother.

Lots of love,
Gary Krieger
Encino, CA


Gary Krieger

To: Heather
Submitted By: Linda Luke

I am giving one of your beautiful touchstones to my friend Heather. Heather has blessed many lives with no expectations of reward. She chooses to live a life of service. She lives very simply in minimal space, but right outside her door is a beautiful garden that she created. When I go out of town she takes care of my cats for me. She goes way beyond what a normal cat nanny would do. They get fed, brushed, and so much love that they miss her when I come home. Her priority is their care and she often will spend hours with them. The kitty email reports she sends are hilarious.
In recent months she has helped someone declutter, clean and remodel their home, supported our dear friend who has lost much of her mobility, and is helping her own father. It’s as if she floats through life from person to person wherever she is guided and needed.
The amazing thing is that she does not charge fees for anything that she does. She trusts that God will provide and he always does. Those of us who are touched by her light support her however we can. All of this comes with a very humble, loving spirit. She is intelligent, insightful, loving, and talented at creating beauty in simple ways. I am grateful and honored to have Heather in my life and call her a friend.

Life and Spiritual Coach, Linda Luke
Be Your Best Self - Live Your Best Life
www.lifecoachlinda.com

To: Tom Morrison

From: Kenneth Akermann and Joshua Akermann

Tomorrow afternoon my son, Josh, will be opening up our garage to four of his high school friends for band practice. Josh is the drummer. I bought him his first set of drums when he was three years old. He has been playing ever since and today has a pretty good sized following. In fact, I expect he will go on to one day be a professional. I have to thank Tom Morrison, my next door neighbor back in Plano, Texas, for introducing me, and if truth be told, all of the kids on our block, to the joy of playing drums. Had it not been for Tom’s influence, I am certain that I would not have become a drummer, and certainly would have not introduced Josh to the drums. We are both grateful to Tom Morrison for sharing his gift. Tom, you definitely changed a few lives.